Feeling: Hungry
Listening to: Fight Song by The Appleseed Cast

I think I just needed to see Eleena 'cause now I feel better about this place and it doesn't seem so horrible. My hypothesis is that because I was dragged away from my comfort zone and dumped in a foreign land so suddenly (Though it wasn't the most sudden, it was indeed sudden), I had held in lots of bitterness and I just needed a bit of that comfort zone to make everything better. I should write a thesis on it. But anyway, because of her (Eleena), I don't enjoy microwavable dinners anymore (And it's what I've been relying on for two months). :[ Damn her and her ability to cook!

It hailed today. I first thought it was raining. Then, I thought it was just windy. Then, I looked out the window and thought it was hailing. Then, I Googled and thought it was sleeting. Now, I believe it was hailing, but I could be terribly wrong. Yes, it was a very complicated process.

So, if you couldn't take the hint, I have made my first solo train experience and survived, as well as ventured around Keele, Stoke-On-Trent, Newcastle and Alton Towers. I'd say that's quite an achievement. Go, me! :D

And now, I bid you adieu. But before I go, where are you, Azmin?

Oh! And because we're on the topic (Haha, we are so not. :D), I decided to choose Communication as my additional subject because in the little caption describing our choices, it said it would come in handy (I can't think of the exact word. And it was a really cool word! :[) to students studying Media.

So, because I'm so cool and I know you're all just dying to know, here's what my timetable's like for this term:

Monday:
11:10-13:00 | Media Scholarship | Biosciences 0.01
13:10-14:00 | Introduction to Human Communication | Psychology 1.05
16:10-17:00 | Media Scholarship | Biosciences 0.01

Tuesday:
11:10-12:00 | Introduction to Human Communication | Law 0.22
15:10-16:00 | Media Scholarship seminar | Bute 1.26

Wednesday:
11:10-13:00 | History of Mass Communication and Culture | Law 2.27

Thursday:
10:00-10:50 | History of Mass Communication and Culture seminar | Bute 1.26
15:10-16:00 | Introduction to Human Communication seminar | Optometry 1.08

The random underlined words at the end of each phrase in italics is the name of the building and the room number. The Journalism building doesn't have big enough lecture rooms so they like to move us around like robots. :D People seem to find it a bad thing, but the way I see it, I can pretend I'm a lawyer or a psychologist or an optometrist whenever I want to (You know me, always looking at the brighter side of things. I'm so optimistic. :D :D :D :D :D And smiley!).

I'm starting to cough up the yucky stuff. So, I better get my ass into bed now. *Snorts.

PS. Besides eBay, I think I'm also addicted to exclamation marks! I can't get enough of them! They just make every sentence seem so exciting!!!!!!!!!!

PPS. I forgot what I was going to say. Keep alert because I might remember and decide to update this little bit, but who knows? I'm unpredictable. Huhuhuhuuu. ;]

Feeling: Blaaaargh

Of all the things I could lose, I have now lost my voice. Thank you, Fresher's Flu, this is really a blessing.

I didn't think the next episode would be ready this soon (Please refer to previous post).

--WE WILL NOW CUT TO A SHORT BREAK FOR ADVERTISEMENTS--
Click to know how my Media Scholarship presentation is going.

--AND NOW, BACK TO YOUR PROGRAMME--

Feeling: Better

Now, I've lost a needle in my bed. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

What will be next? Stay tuned to find out what happens in the following episode of Things I Lose in My Room. Oooh. Suspense.

Feeling: Bubble-gummy
Listening to: Smile In Your Sleep by Silverstein

Nobody move. I believe have lost a piece of tuna somewhere in my room, and I think I'm only going to find it when it's all smelly and gross. You'd think 'cause my room's so tiny, it'd be really hard to lose stuff. And I guess that would be true if my room wasn't so messy. :D So, I shall sift through my belongings until I find something remotely similar to a piece of tuna. Awesome.

I also think I'm strangely addicted to eBay. Help!

Happy Spatula Day!

I owe you words.

Words that will soothe your soul and help you remember why you read my words in the first place.

Words that escape and find and love and hold.

Words that are there and yet fleeting.

Words that you know from the depths of what makes you who you are that you need them.

Words that I can't give to you just yet.

Words that will have to wait.


So, like... yeah.

I think I cried her all away.

Feeling: Tickly
Listening to: Cross My Heart by The Rocket Summer

I am so anti-social, hahahahahahahahahahahaha. And that automatically makes me cool, so suck on that, bitches.

BITCHESSSSSSS.

I have a blister on the back of my foot. Who the hell gave it the right to just barge into my life and attach itself to my foot?! Jeez. A little respect, please?

Anyway, where was I before I was so rudely interrupted by that asshole of a blister? Oh, yes. I had my first lecture today, hahahahahahahahahahahaha. And that automatically makes me cooler than before. Ever feel like everything is just repetition after repetition? :]

Feeling: Sick
Listening to: The Distance From The Bottom by The Black Maria

I don't really know what to say. So, here's a list of things I should say more creatively but just lack the inspiration (Azmin).

1. I'm here.
   
2. Not there.
   
3. I miss Azmin.
   
4. Kay, I miss everyone.
   
5. I feel extremely out of place.
   
6. Wo ai wo de nan peng you.
   
7. Saya sepasang kasut.
   
8. I like cheese.
   
9. Que te pasa?
   
10. I think I'm going to drink half a carton of milk.
    
11. Now! :D
    
12. Because I took it out the kitchen into my room.
    
13. And I don't want to bring it back.
    
14. Because that means I have to walk there.
    
15. And then find a place to put it.
    
16. WAAAAAAAAH SEEEEH.

Dude.

Feeling: Sluggish
Listening to: For All We Know by Nat King Cole

It all happened too fast, and tomorrow came too soon, but I suppose I should bid my farewell. :] There it is.

And now, because I believe this is another one of those exceptionally sad songs I always write about, I'm going to post the lyrics down, just so you know what I'm talking about.

For All We Know by Nat King Cole
For all we know, we may never meet again.
Before you go, make this moment sweet again.
We won't say good night until the last minute.
I'll hold out my hand and my heart will be in it.

For all we know, this may only be a dream.
We come and go like a ripple on a stream.
So, love me tonight; tomorrow was made for some.
Tomorrow may never come, for all we know.
If you recognise it, that may be because it's the song Mr. Powell sang at the final assembly for ISB's IB class of 2006-2008, but I could be wrong.

I'll see you soon.

Days remaining: 0

So, as you could possibly know already, I'm really, really, really, really, terribly, frightfully scared.

Please, Time... Stop.

I just need a little space to breathe, and right now, you're smothering me.



But that would only be possible in a magical, upside down world where people walk around on their hands and dogs are kept in fishbowls (dogbowls?) because apparently (or so they say), life is a sadistic bitch. She moves at her own pace, and she waits for no one (Though I do hope this is a lie - a horrible myth that people made up to scare little children into going to sleep at night. I mean, that makes more sense, right?).

I also don't know what additional subjects to take for my first year at university. But that's mostly unrelated.

Days remaining: 10 (FUUUUUUUUCK)

Feeling: Sore

I forgot to mention my grandmother's latest discovery (from talking to people I, nor anyone else, can see, I assume) in the last post. This happened when I entered the kitchen one evening to find her sitting in her usual spot at the table. Extending a hand in the form of a handshake, she expressed her congratulations and continued to speak in Chinese. Too fluent (Kay, I think I've forgotten approximately all of the Mandarin I worked so hard (Not really) to learn in those eight years at Chung Hwa Middle School) and fast for me to understand, I just smiled awkwardly. So, I was relieved when she changed her language of choice to English as she asked if I was happy and informed me that I was engaged to the son of a bishop, a boy that, according to her, comes from a very good family (who also consists of her adoptive parents, and who were, apparently, standing behind me), from whom I could learn a thing or two. It seemed I kept that awkward smile on my face forever because I wanted to laugh, and I guess she noticed 'cause she said I looked embarrassed. :D She gave me advice and told me to pray everyday. Finally, she asked if my mother knew (about my engagement, hahahaha) and I shamefully answered "Yes," in an attempt to ease her soul. Then, I ran out of the kitchen.

Hehehehe. :D

Note: I am not engaged (at least, not to a bishop's son), but you are welcome to send your congratulatory messages for entertainment purposes.

Also, to the boy reading over my shoulder (;]), ai lahv yah.

Feeling: Fusty
Listening to: Yellow by Coldplay

So... How is everybody? Yeah, I feel the awkwardness, too. It's like I don't even know you anymore. :p

As long as we're catching up, let me just say that I feel like I'm not using my (very limited, constantly decreasing) time correctly. I wake up at lunch and disgust myself when I realise I could have spent those precious moments doing more worthy things. It's like I lose half my day by simply sleeping it away (Though it could have something to do with me being Supermoose and all. I mean, flying around every night, fighting crime, helping citizens in distress, forever at the beck and call of people in need can get rather tiring, but oops, you weren't supposed to know that). It's quite depressing. I guess there is such a thing as too much sleep. And I know, I know. It sounds ke-raaayy-zeee.

Kay, your turn.

"I guess we don't know what's real or unreal," she had said without meaning to. "You stare at anything long enough and suddenly it looks monstrous." - Queen Of The Damned by Anne Rice

Days remaining: 20

Like oh, my God, totally. Hug, hug. Kiss, kiss.

Feeling: In need of a shower
Listening to: Miss You by Aselin Debison

At 2:23 this morning, I removed my blankets, planned on writing what will follow only to have the internet fail me, thus, resulting in it's swift delay in publication:

I am awake even though I'm really tired because I can't sleep because I keep tossing and turning and twisting beneath the bed sheets because my mind is occupied by disturbing thoughts because I am scared as hell because basically and honestly and truthfully, I don't want to grow up. And I fear that if I don't climb out of the bunk bed I use to replenish energy, and get rid of these thoughts for at least just a few hours, I may explode.

Please tell me I'm not alone in this, because despite the awful rumours, I hate being alone, and to think that that is the only way I will get through this, it is so scary.

Days remaining: 30

I would also like to add that my right ear has been blocked for about three days. It's very disturbing. Especially when I eat and the munching sound is just screaming at me.

Oh, and while I was going through those e-mails I mentioned in the previous post, I came across an e-mail saying I, as a "gothic mortal", should go to this website. I clicked on it, thinking "What the hell is this?" And then, and then, and then, I kind of screamed and went oogly-eyed as soon as I read the title of the page. :D :D But I guess you'd only understand my reaction if you read Anne Rice.

Yeaaaah.

Days remaining: 36

Feeling: Kapoot

I've been reading through old (as in very old) e-mails I should have deleted a very (as in very very) long time ago. It was painful and slightly stomach-tightening, and I can't help but feel like I was such a bitch. Like. WOWWWWWW. I'm so sorry. And ashamed of myself. And so, in tribute to those I been mean towards, in the fashion that has stuck to my very soul, I have written down words:

To whoever I have hurt due to my naivite (I could name a few, but I think you know who you are. Okay, I'll give initials. A, D, T, C, K and H),

I am on my knees and begging profusely for your forgiveness. Time has blessed me with wisdom (That wasn't the right word. I'm not wise, hahah (Well, I mean, I've grown out of most of my naivite and stupidity)), and I am now aware of how mean I was to you. Whether you forgive me or not (And I can see how you wouldn't want to even consider it), please understand I am a changed female unit and I have been unexpectedly acquainted with the disgusting habits of the much younger me. As such, I apologise if my growing up has ended in your demise. Do not hesitate to approach me to confirm I have been a bitch because I suppose I do need a few more slaps in the face to bring me back to reality.

Again, I am terribly sorry and honestly, this makes me hate the younger me even more.

With sincere apologies,
Sue-Anne

Days remaining: 37

I am scared.

Days remaining: 41

Hahahahaha. I just noticed all the dead ants lying around (Again, ant enthusiasts, I am very sorry for my uncontrollable nature).

Feeling: Hyperactive
Listening to: We Laugh Indoors by Death Cab For Cutie

I am currently using the desktop computer I have in the living room area, and since my last use of the device, it seems to have attracted the attention of some very annoying ants (If you will please refer to an early post made here, you will understand my dislike for the creatures). Their constant moving about on the desk and mouse and other things this tiny desk has managed to accumulate has driven me to squash each and every one I see. I know, this does seem very murderous and sadistic of me, but I don't have an excuse so I guess I am very murderous and sadistic. Hence, I place here open-heartedly my apologies to ant enthusiasts out there offended by my actions.

As I was saying, I was quite enjoying myself as I thumped by palm all over the designated "ant-infested" area, taking pleasure in the pain I inflicted upon these helpless animals (Another part of my plan to take over the world), when I noticed these poor things actually left behind some kind of clear fluid after having supposedly died. And may I add, it takes more than you think to kill ants with your fingers, because you're caught in between feeling bad and not wanting to get dead ant (and dead ant juice) on your hands and realising your duty to save humankind from the insanity these insects can cause, but in the end, you always end up pushing your thumb into them more than once (and than was perhaps needed) when you notice them limping to the other side of the table. I think I have killed around twenty so far, though that number is likely to steadily increase as the day progresses.

That's all I had to say. I just felt you deserved to know that ants have liquidy things that leave their bodies when squashed. But, please, children, do not try this at home. At least not without any adult supervision. Ants can be quite fiesty and thus, dangerous.

Apart from that though, here is a link to another one of those things I cannot stop creating. :D I suppose it would be right to say I am addicted. Or obsessed at least. Ooh, I have to go. I see an ant.