1, 2, 3.

Feeling: Pissed
Listening to: Autumns Monologue by From Autumn To Ashes

Autumns Monologue by From Autumn To Ashes

Oh why cant I be what you need
a new improved version of me
but i'm nothing so good
no i'm nothing
just bones, a lonely ghost burning down songs
of violence of love and of sorrow
i beg for just one more tomorrow
where you hold me down fold me in
deep deep deep in the heart of your sins

I break in two over you
I break in two
And each piece of me dies
And only you can give the breath of life
But you dont see me, you dont...

here i'm in between darkness and light
bleached and blinded by these nights
where im tossing and tortured til dawn
by you, visions of you then youre gone
the shock lifts the red from my face
when i hear someone's taking my place
how could love be so thoughtless, so cruel
when all, all that i did was for you

i break in two over you
i break in two
and each piece of me dies
and only you can give the breath of life
but you dont see me you dont..

i break in two over you
i break in two
and each piece of me dies
and only you can give the breath of life
but you dont see me you don't...

i break in two over you
i break in two over you, over you
i break in two
i would break in two for you
now you see me
now you don't
now you need me
now you don't


I love this song. It's cool. The female vocalist, Melanie Wills, has massive talent too. She sings so gothic-like. So yep, I love this song.

I scanned some pictures today just before going to piano. They were taken around the quarrelling-before play time. Here's a peek, you know what to do:


The Oogaboogas of Fishbone Island on the day of the full English Day rehersal.


Jasmine M & Chun Yang being stupid.


Kah Ming. We always tease him with his name, i.e "Kah Ming, are you coming?" cause his name sounds like coming. Yeah, that wasn't funny.


Zhi Shiong. We make fun of this guy's name too. Cause it's said like 'jee shiong' and that means chicken breast in Chinese, so we just call him Chicken Breast.


Eng Lwn, Kelvin Tang <3 & Chicken Breast a.k.a Dove Cracker, Kelvin & Frank Deanwood practicing Fishbone Island.


Lip Wei. He broke his arm now, so he won't be drinking like that for a while.


Eng Lwn, Dove Cracker, whatever.


Kelvin Tang <3. I love this picture.


Chun Yang & I being stupid. Actually, we're doing something from Fishbone Island.


Chicken Breast & Zi Ling.


Kelvin Yee <3, telling you to fuck off.


Chun Yang & Kelvin Tang <3 listening to Chicken Breast's camera. I always thought you look at cameras, but no. You listen to this one.


Eng Lwn & Sazaly.


From L-R: Kelvin Tang <3, Ai Ti, Meadlinde, Yee Teng & Mary. Can you tell which ones were Oogaboogas?

Thanks. I'll blog more when I feel like it. Cheers.

Lies Will Bring Me Back To You

Feeling: Pissed at the world.
Listening to: Satellites In Fists by Anatomy Of A Ghost

I was hit by a car on Saturday night. That was the night of the perayaan(if that's even what it's called) that I went to with Prince and his friend. Yup. The car was going into the road that was being used for the stalls since the other side was blocked as well. Then I was looking at something on one of the stalls when I felt a bump on my side. I heard Prince's friend hitting the car and yelling at the driver. Haha! The car hit me! Then Prince was like "Are you okay? I told you.. Bruneians do everything with their eyes closed." Prince, I can't agree with you more.

The evening was alright, I guess. I got introduced to his millions of friends, and one being a dude with liberty spikes. That was cool. I know I sound like a total geek, but I like them. Haha. I can't remember his name though, although I don't think it was ever mentioned to me. He's in one of those groups where each member has a specific hairstyle like a mohawk, or liberty spikes, and etc. Prince walked with them to their meeting place, then one of the guys that was already there called him over, so he went. Then when we were leaving they all said "Bye Sue-Anne." Haha. I was just wondering how they all knew my name. Yeh. Then that guy I got introduced to, he said "Bye Sue-Anne.. Taking care. Nice to meet you." I wanted to laugh. Just because it sounded so cute.

So that was Saturday, not it's Thursday already. I don't want to say certain things here for protection of privacy purposes.

I wanted to watch Jeepers Creepers on StarMovies, but it's already started and I hate watching movies from the middle of them, then I have to watch the beginning again. So it's like watching the movie backwards. I'll wait for a repeat.

I think I'm going to die. I mean, of course I'm going to die. But it just feels like I'm in the process of dying already. Everything was going so well after the play, I even found someone who makes me smile whenever I think about him. I was in a good mood every day after that, but it doesn't matter, does it? I be happy, and someone isn't. Why? He's not happy when I'm happy? He liked it better when I was sad?

Sometimes I don't understand him. It's as if he was happier when I was cutting myself. I tell him what makes me sad/angry, and he does more of it. It's almost as if it's intentionally. Sometimes I'm tempted to lie to him, just to prevent him from getting angry at me, but then I think that telling the truth would be better as I'm trying to not lie as much. And then he just gets angry, no matter how much I try to point out to him that I DID tell him the truth. That I could have lied and he wouldn't have known, and he wouldn't have gotten angry. When he realized this too, when he realized I try to protect him from myself, he gets angry as well. Or is it sadness? I can't really tell anymore. It's all a blur to me and now it just makes me angry, but I refuse to be degraded to that level again.

I'm sorry, I babble. I think I'll go now. There's nothing more to say.

Blood Stains On The Ground

Feeling: Relieved
Listening to Watching: South Park *Episode 514 (Butters Very Own Episode)

'Fishbone Island' was finally shown today at the opening ceremony of CHMS's English week. The play we'd been working so hard to get together, quarelling so much about was finally over. It's hard to believe that everything we'd been fussing about for the past 2 months was over in a little less than 20 minutes. We got all good reviews though. Everyone said it was good, even the principal herself said so. So it's all good, I guess.

We were all nervous before going on stage, but after we went on, it all cooled down. Even I wasn't shy or nervous, just rather excited. Can't ignore the fact that I loved the way they applauded and laughed, it was nice. The feeling of satisfaction. Yeah, I think that was it.

It was very, very messy backstage though. There were people running around looking for their stuff in the cramped up space we got for changing in. But as they say, "All's well that end's well."

But Jasmine is still annoying me. She still irritates me and I feel like such a backstabbing two-faced traitor. But she's making me feel this way... Whatever. I think that still makes me a traitor all the same. She keeps on taking too much credit for things she didn't entirely do. She's hinting for someone to tell her that she's great. Ah.. But nevermind. The limelight does strange things to people.

That's all. I can't bare anymore thinking, my brain's about to explode. Bye now.<